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yo mero, what about advice for a white chick that wants to date a black dude?? and cuz i'm mad corny, how can i impress his family without looking like i asked for advice on this very subject...hmmm...damn... anyway, help please!
- January 13, 2011 9:38 AM
YO THIS IS EXTREMELY BASIC MA, THIS IS LIKE YOU ASKING ME ADVICE ON HOW TO BOIL WATER.
YOU WALK UP TO THE DUDE, SAY HELLO, AND YOU'RE IN. BLACK DUDES LOVE WHITE GIRLS. YOU COULD EVEN BE A LITTLE FAT, IT DON'T EVEN MATTER.
NOW AS FAR AS IMPRESSING HIS FAMILY, IF THEY'RE GHETTO, THEY'LL BE IMPRESSED THAT YOU'RE WHITE AND JAMAL BAGGED A WHITE BITCH. IF THEY'RE EDUCATED THEN THEY'RE PROBABLY WHITER THAN YOU ARE SO JUST RELAX. DON'T GO IN THERE QUOTING MALCOLM X AND SHIT. THEY'LL SEE RIGHT THROUGH THAT, AND DON'T SHOW UP WITH A BUCKET OF CHICKEN. THAT'S CONDESCENDING...IM SAYIN, THEY'LL EAT IT AND LOVE IT. (WHO DOESN'T LOVE FRIED CHICKEN?) BUT THEN THEY'LL BE LIKE "WHAT A RACIST BITCH" AS SOON AS YOU LEAVE.
SO WHAT YOU DO IS, FIND OUT IF THEY DRINK, AND BRING THEM A BOTTLE ACCORDING TO THEIR GHETTONESS LEVEL.
VERY GHETTO: A BOTTLE OF HENNESSY
KINDA GHETTO: A BOTTLE OF COURVOISIER
NOT REALLY GHETTO: A BOTTLE OF YELLOWTAIL OR SOME SHIT
YOU'RE FUCKIN BRYANT GUMBEL: A 2006 BOTTLE OF CROGNOLO SETTE PONTI AND A FRUIT BASKET
IF THEY DON'T DRINK THEN JUST SHOW UP AND BE YOURSELF. THEY MIGHT SCOFF AT YOUR WHITENESS BUT ITS BETTER THAN TRYIN TO FIT IN AND ENDIN UP LOOKIN LIKE THIS.
NOTE: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU GET SHITFACED, CUZ YOU'LL END UP SAYIN "YALL" "NIGGA" OR "CHILL B" CUZ THEY ARE AND YOU'LL GET LAUGHED INTO OUTER SPACE OR BEAT UP.
