YO THIS JUST CAME TO ME CUZ I SEEN SOME NIGGA PASSED OUT ON A BENCH AND HOMIE OBVIOUSLY PISSED ON HIS DELF. A REGULAR DUDE THOUGH NOT SOME HOMELESS NIGGA WHO PROBABLY PISS ON HISSELF TO STAY WARM.
NIGGAS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DO DRUGS. AND THIS IS FINNA BE WAY TOO MUCH INFO FOR ONE POST.
THERES SHIT THAT I'M NOT GONNA SPEAK ON CUZ I DON'T KNOW ABOUT IT...NEVER TOUCHED CRACK OR MANTECA CUZ AS ANYONE FROM THE BRONX (OR ANY BIG CITY) WITH A PARENT (JUST ONE, OR EVEN A GRANDMA) CAN TELL YOU, THERES SO MANY FIENDS EVERYWHERE STRUNG OUT ON EITHER OF THOSE THAT ITS LIKE "NIGGA WHY THE FUCK WOULD I DO THAT?" EVEN THOUGH ITS QUESTIONABLE WE'RE ALL RAISED TO THINK THAT ONE HIT OF A CRACK PIPE IS GONNA MAGICALLY TURN YOU INTO A CRACKHEAD, OR STICKIN THE DEVILS DICK IN YOUR VEIN THAT ONE TIME IS GONNA TURN YOU INTO A TOOTHLESS TRANNY HOOKER WITH TRACK MARKS AND A 3 DAY OLD TURD SMUSHED BETWEEN YA CHEEKS...AND NONE OF US IS TRYNA FIND OUT IF THAT'S TRUE OR NOT.
SO IMA HELP YOU NIGGAS THAT NEED LIFE COACHES OUT BY TELLIN YOU HOW TO DO DRUGS.
PT. 1 IS GONNA COVER
-ALCOHOL
-WEED
-PILLS
-DUST
ILL GET TO THE OTHER SHIT LATER I CAN'T BE SITTIN HERE ALL DAY I GOT SHIT TO DO.
ALCOHOL - YEAH NIGGA ALCOHOL IS A DRUG, DIDN'T THE COP COME TO YOUR JUNIOR HIGH AND TELL YOU THAT? FIRST OFF RELAX B YOU AIN'T 15 AND THE COPS AIN'T GONNA GIVE YOU A SUMMONS, YOU'RE IN A BAR SO SIP YOUR DRINKS. WHEN YOU START POUNDIN SHIT IS WHEN YOU DO THAT "PSH I AIN'T EVEN DRUNK NIGGA IM GOOD" SHIT...TILL YOU STAND UP AND GO OUTSIDE TO SMOKE A CIGARETTE AND START TALKING TO THE FIRST THING WITH TITS THINKIN YOUR MACKIN IT WILD HARD, SAYIN SOME BILLY DEE SHIT WHEN WHAT IS ACTUALLY COMIN OUTTA YOUR MOUTH IS "YOU WANNA COME HOMEWIH ME I GOT A BEERRRS IN MUSIC ON MY GOMPUTERS" THEN SHE WALKS AWAY AND YOU PUT THE LIT END OF THE CIGARETTE IN YOUR MOUTH LIKE "YOU TRIPPIN BITCH" AND IT BURNS YOU SO YOU DROP IT AND FALL OVER TRYNA PICK IT UP. GOOD SHIT DICKHEAD NOW YOU'RE ON 20 FACEBOOKS AND PEOPLE ARE TAGGING YOU AS "DRUNK ASSHOLE THAT FELL" SO MY RULE IS SIP YOUR DRINKS AND WHEN YOU STARTNA FEEL TIPSY SWITCH GEARS TO BEERS SO YOU DON'T MAKE A FOOL OF YOURSELF. ITS ALL ABOUT GETTIN NICE, WHEN YOU START DOIN THE JADAKISS LAUGH FOR NO REASON ITS TIME TO HIT THE DINER WITH SHORTY AND GET A SHORT STACK BEFORE YOU GO HOME AND SMASH (OR PASS OUT WHILE SHE TEXTS HER FRIENDS ABOUT WHAT A LAME YOU ARE).
WEED - AHHH WEED, GOOD OLD WEED...WEED IS GOOD B, MY FUCKIN GRANDFATHER SMOKED WEED NIGGA IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO MANEUVER WITH WEED WHY ARE YOU EVEN READING THIS? HAVE YOU EVER DONE ANYTHING? HAVE YOU EVER EVEN JERKED OFF AT WORK OR STUCK YOUR FINGER IN A GIRLS ASS? PROBABLY NOT. SMOKE AS MUCH WEED AS YOU WANT, THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN IS YOU WAKE UP AND TRY TO MAKE FRIED OREOS WITH PANCAKE MIX...THE ONLY THING I CAN SAY ABOUT WEED IS THIS, IF YOU'RE MAKING PLANS TO GO OUT TO A PARTY AT NIGHT OR A SHOW OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT AND YOU MEET UP SOMEWHERE TO "PREGAME" DO NOT INCLUDE WEED IN YOUR PREGAMING UNLESS YOU WANNA CANCEL YOUR PLANS AND STAY HOME PLAYING HALO.
PILLS - ALL PILLS ARE DIFFERENT RIGHT SO IMA BREAK IT DOWN BUT THE ONE THING THAT HOLDS TRUE FOR PILLS IS THAT UNLESS YOU BLOWIN THEM UP YOUR NASAL IT'LL TAKE A SECOND TO KICK IN. ITS NOT DUST B, YOU NOT GONNA SWALLOW A PILL AND INSTANTLY BE FLYIN. GIVE IT A LITTLE WHILE BEFORE YOU SAY "MAN FUCK THIS SHIT" AND POP ANOTHER 6, I LEARNED THAT THE HARD WAY AND ENDED UP LAID OUT IN MY HOMEBOYS BATHROOM IN JACKSON HEIGHTS WITH A BITCH WITH 2 FINGERS ON ONE HAND TRYNA TIP A GLASS OF WATER INTO MY MOUTH TALKIN BOUT "DRINK PAPI DRINK" WHILE IM HAVIN A PANIC ATTACK THINKIN "WHY CAN'T I MOVE MY HEAD?"...
XANAX: I NEVER ATE THE BABY XANNIES, JUST THE STICKS AND LEMME TELL YOU, IF YOU DON'T EAT THESE THINGS ON A REGULAR BASIS, EAT HALF OF ONE AND FEEL IT OUT. THESE THINGS HAVE MONOSODIUM IDONTGIVEAFUCKAMATE IN THEM AND WHEN YOU'RE ON THE SHIT ITS WORSE THAN COKE CUZ YOU FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING IS LEGAL AND YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING. YOU ALSO THINK YOU'RE THE FUCKIN MAN WHEN IN REALITY YOUR A WORD SLURRING FOOD INHALING PIECE OF SHIT. YOU ALSO WON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING YOU DID WHEN YOU WERE AT THE TIPPY TOP OF XANAX MOUNTAIN SO CHECK YOUR VOICEMAIL THE NEXT DAY TO MAKE SURE YOU DIDN'T PUNCH YOUR SISTER OR RAPE SOMEBODY BY ACCIDENT. GETTING PUSSY ON XANAX IS WASSUP THOUGH, YOU'LL BE IN THE CHEEKS FOR HOURS.
PERCOCET: THE SCHOOL BUS PERCS ARE $, I HAD A VELVET POUCH FULL OF THESE JOINTS AT ONE POINT AND I WAS POPPIN THEM LIKE CANDY. THEY GIVE YOU THE "IM DRUNK" FEELING WITHOUT ACTUALLY BEING FULLA ALCOHOL. START WITH TWO AND THEN TAKE THEM EVERY COUPLE HOURS TO KEEP YOUR SWAG ON. THEY MAKE YOUR FACE ITCH AND MAKE BEER TASTE LIKE BEING RICH. OH SHIT THAT WAS A BAR HOLLA! IF YOU EAT ALOT OF THESE THINGS AND THEN DON'T EAT THEM YOU'RE GONNA FEEL LIKE SHIT AND YOUR BACK IS GONNA FEEL LIKE THERES A MIDGET SPEEDBAGGIN ON YOUR KIDNEYS.
OXYCONTIN: THIS SHIT IS THE DEVIL AND EVERYTIME I ATE ONE I ENDED UP AT A BAR FREESTYLING OVER A TAYLOR SWIFT SONG WHILE MY HOMEBOY PUKED HIS EYEBALLS OUT HIS NOSE. DON'T EVEN EAT THESE. SELL THEM AND BUY PERCS AND WEED.
ECSTASY PILL: (I SAID THAT IN AN ALBANIAN VOICE) THESE SHITS WERE PLAYED OUT AND MADE A COMEBACK. THEY MAKE BUMPING INTO A WALL FEEL LIKE LAYING IN A TUB OF MILKSHAKE WITH YOUR MOUTH OPEN GETTING 32 BLOWJOBS FROM EVERY BAD BITCH YOU EVER SAW ON THE TRAIN WHILE YOU GET A FOOT MASSAGE. THE NEXT DAY YOU FEEL LIKE A DRYMOUTH SUICIDAL GARBAGE FART SO GET READY...I RECOMMEND GETTING A FEMALE TO BLOW YOU ON THIS SHIT, LADIES, GET A DUDE TO EAT YOUR BUTTHOLE OR SUMN, WHATEVER YOU INTO.
THOSE ARE THE ONLY PILLS THAT MATTER, IF YOU GOT KLONOPINS OR VALIUMS OR VICODINS JUST EAT THEM AND STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS.
DUST - FOR THOSE OF YOU UNFAMILIAR WITH DUST ITS LITTLE FLAKES SOAKED IN SOME EVIL CHEMICAL THAT YOU CAN EITHER SMOKE ALONE OR MIX WITH WEED. IF YOU AIN'T A DUSTHEAD YOU GOTTA JAMES BROWN THIS SHIT, HIT IT AND QUIT IT. THIS AIN'T WEED MY NIGGA HIT IT TWICE THEN RELAX. REGARDLESS DO NOT SMOKE THIS SHIT IN PUBLIC. UNLESS YOU LIKE LOSING YOUR FUCKIN MIND. ONE OF MY NIGGAS SMOKED THIS SHIT IN THE CRIB AND THEN DECIDED HE NEEDED TO GO TO THE STORE (DRIVING 7MPH THE WRONG WAY DOWN THE STREET IN THE RAIN AT 2AM) AND CAME BACK VISIBLY UPSET. SOME DRUGS YOU DO TO MAKE AN ACTIVITY MORE POPPIN...IN THIS CASE, THE DRUG IS THE ACTIVITY. DON'T TRY TO DO ANYTHING MORE COMPLICATED THAN TALK ABOUT RAP MUSIC OR JUMP ON A TRAMPOLINE. I SAT ON A ROCK BY SOME WATER FOR 5 HOURS ON THIS SHIT ONCE TILL THE TIDE CAME IN AND I GOT WET AND WAS OD CONFUSED. THEN I GOT UP AND THE WHOLE WALK HOME FELT LIKE I WAS WALKIN THROUGH 3 FT OF MUD. FOR SOME REASON POP LOCKIN ON DUST IS EXTREMELY FUNNY. TRY IT.
FOR EVERYTHING ON HERE MODERATION IS KEY, EVEN WITH WEED CUZ REALLY, YOU COULD BE OUTSIDE DOIN SHIT INSTEAD OF SITTING HOME TRYNA UP YOUR GAMERSCORE. ALSO YOU DON'T WANNA BE SOME ADDICT ASS NIGGA LOOKIN LIKE YOU WOKE UP FROM 6 NAPS ALL THE TIME MAD HURT WIT NO SHAPEUP. ENJOY YASELF DON'T DESTROY YASELF. (GOT DEEP ON YOU NIGGAS REAL QUICK POW)
