MEMBER THAT SHOW? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO TOOTIE B? AND THE NIGGA WITH THE BABY DREADS ALWAYS STRUCK ME AS MAD GAYISH, IS HE MO, OR BRITISH? GOOGLE THAT FOR ME. ANYWAY... "i just finished school last year and i wana move out with a homie. what are some absolute necessities we need to have in the household excluding my xbox 360 and his fridge."
YOU NOT GIVING ME ALOTTA DETAILS 5, BUT I'LL ASSUME ITS JUST YOU AND YOUR HOMEBOY. IMA TELL YOU SOMETHING OFF TOP, ITS NOT GONNA JUST BE YOU AND YOUR HOMEBOY. EVER...IF YOU'RE 25 & UNDER (OR 30 & UNDER DEPENDING ON YOUR EDUCATIONAL/JOB STATUS) NIGGAS WILL BE SLIDIN UNDER YOUR DOOR 24/7 LIKE CHINESE FOOD MENUS. KNOCKIN ON YOUR DOOR MAD DRUNK OR MAD HIGH OR LYIN LIKE "I WAS JUST AROUND MAN, WHATS UP?" WHEN IN REALITY THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHERE TO CRASH TO SMOKE WEED AND KILL A COUPLE HOURS SO THEY WERE LIKE "YO THIS GUY IS PROBABLY HOME LETS JUST GO OVER THERE."...SHIT WILL GET ON YOUR NERVES AND YOU GOTTA DECIDE WHO'S GONNA BE "THE DICK" THAT HAS TO KICK NIGGAS OUT WHEN ITS TIME TO GO. THERE'S PROS THOUGH, IF YOUR HOMEBOY ISN'T A FUCKIN HERB WILLIAMS THEN THAT'S DOUBLE THE FEMALE INTAKE AND ALSO A WINGMAN TO ENTERTAIN THE FAT BITCH WHILE YOU IN THE OTHER ROOM WITH THE DOPE BITCH GETTIN TOP WITH THE DOOR OPEN LIKE "WUZHANNINNN!!" WITH A "MONK" RERUN PLAYIN ON THE TV. BUT YO, BACK TO THE POINT, WHICH IS "ESSENTIALS".
IMA GIVE YOU A LIST, I'LL ADD MORE IF I REMEMBER MORE BUT FOR NOW THIS IS WHAT I GOT FOR YOU LIL HOMIE.
- A BIG ASS HAMPER...IM TALKIN ABOUT BIG NIGGA, CUZ NIGGAS ARE DIRTBAGS AND WILL TAKE OFF SOCKS AND THROW THEM SHITS ON THE FLOOR AND WIPE THEY DICK WITH A WHITE TEE AFTER THEY FUCK A BITCH AND USE THAT SAME WHITE TEE TO WIPE DOWN THE COUNTER THEN THROW THAT SHIT IN A CORNER...HAVE A BIG ASS HAMPER SO NIGGAS DONT DO THIS. TRUST ME B, BITCHES DON'T WANNA SEE A WHITE TEE WITH SMEGMA AND KETCHUP SITTIN NEXT TO THE COUCH. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT SMELLS LIKE 5? THE SHIT SMELLS LIKE WHEN YOU PEED ON YASELF IN KINDYGARDEN AND DIDNT WANNA TELL NOBODY CUZ YOU WAS ON A CLASS TRIP SO YOU WRAPPED YOUR SWEATER AROUND YOUR WAIST AND ROCKED LIKE THAT THE WHOLE DAY THEN YOU GOT HOME AND HID IT CUZ YOU AINT WANT YOUR POPS TO KNOW YOU DID PP ON YASELF.
- A BIG ASS TV...IF YOU DON'T SPLURGE ON NOTHING ELSE SPLURGE ON THIS B. A BIG ASS TV IS MAD CRUCIAL MY NIGGA CUZ WHEN NIGGAS ARE OVER (AND THEY'LL BE OVER) YOU DON'T WANT 20 NIGGAS CROWDED AROUND A TV THE SIZE OF A NIKE BOX. THAT SHIT IS MAD UNCOMFORTABLE AND LEADS TO FIGHTS AND SHIT B TRUST ME.
- A VACUUM...YOU KNOW HOW ANNOYING IT IS TO SWEEP UP BLUNT ASHES AND CIGGARETTE BUTTS AND BOTTLE CAPS AND ALL THAT OTHER SHIT? ESPECIALLY IF YOU GOT A RUG. YOU NEED A VACUUM MY NIGGA, A HEAVY DUTY ONE THAT CAN SUCK SHIT UP NO HOMO AND NOT EXPLODE, CUZ YOU'LL BE VACUUMING UP SHIT YOU SHOULDN'T.
-A BIG ASS BROWN AREA RUG TO PUT UNDER WHEREVER THE DRINKIN/SMOKIN/NONSENSE IS GONNA BE HAPPENING...YOU GONNA SPILL MAD AMOUNTS OF SHIT MY MAN, TRUST ME, BEERS, ASHTRAYS, BEERS BEING USED AS ASHTRAYS, FOOD, VAGINA FLUIDS, AND MAD OTHER SHIT. A BROWN RUG ENSURES THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TO MOP TO KEEP THE FLOOR FROM GETTIN STICKY AND NASTY, AND SINCE ITS BROWN EVEN IF YOUR ROOMMATES GIRL COME THROUGH MAD DRUNK AND TAKES THE ILL BEER SHIT ON THE RUG YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO FIND THAT SHIT IF YOU HAD A STUFFY NOSE. JUST DON'T WALK BAREFOOT/IN SOCKS ON THE SHIT CUZ THEN YOUR GUESTS WILL KNOW YOU'RE A DIRTY NIGGA. WHEN IT GETS TOO CRAZY STEAM CLEAN THE SHIT AND START OVER.
-A STRIPPER/PRO THAT RENTS A ROOM SOMEWHERE AND HATES IT...I WAS SHARING AN APT WITH ONE OF MY NIGGAS AND WE HAD A BITCH WHO WOULD COME THROUGH AND CLEAN AND ORGANIZE THE CRIB JUST TO HAVE A PLACE TO KICK IT WITH NIGGAS. SHORTY WOULD COME THROUGH, CLEAN THE WHOLE CRIB AFTER WE TURNED THE SHIT INTO PORT AU PRINCE AND JUST HANG AROUND BEING A FEMALE. ITS ALWAYS GOOD TO HAVE A BITCH AROUND B, JUST BEING THERE, THEY LIKE SCENTED CANDLES MY NIGGA, MAD SOOTHING AND SOMETIMES THEY SAY DUMB SHIT THAT YALL CAN LAUGH ABOUT AFTER SHE LEAVES. (NOTE: THIS IS IF SHE'S COOL, IF SHE'S A BITCH THEN FUCK THE DOOR SHOW THAT BITCH THE INCINERATOR CHUTE.)
-BITCHES IN GENERAL...LIKE I SAID YO ITS GOOD TO HAVE BITCHES AROUND, EVEN IF THEY NOT HOOKERS. THEY DO STUFF LIKE MAKE FOOD AND GIVE TOP, THEY ALSO BREAK UP THE MONOTONY OF HAVING A BUNCH OF DICKS IN A ROOM TALKIN SHIT. IF YOU GOT BITCHES ON DECK HAVE THEM COME TO YOUR CRIB MY G, REGULARLY, IF THEY ENJOY THEYSELF THEN THAT'S GOOD FOR THEM AND GREAT FOR YOU CUZ THEY'LL BRING FRIENDS AND IF THE ORIGINAL FEMALE AINT FUCKIN YOU I BET ONE OF HER FRIENDS WILL. ALSO FEMALES ARE GOOD TO HAVE AROUND IF YOU WANNA KICK NIGGAS OUT YOU CAN PRETEND LIKE YOU BOUT TO SMASH AND NEED TO SMASH ON THE COUCH CUZ YOUR ROOMMATE SPILLED OLIVE OIL ON YOUR MATTRESS.
-A BONG...IF YOU NIGGAS ARE SMOKIN WEED YOU NEED THIS B, I KNOW BONGS ARE MAD WHITEBOY COLLEGE STATUS BUT NIGGAS DON'T ALWAYS WANNA GO TO THE STORE FOR DUTCHES B, AND SOMETIMES NIGGAS COME THROUGH WITH LARGE AMMOUNTS OF SOME "EHH" WEED WHERE A DUTCH IS POINTLESS. SO YOU GONNA NEED THAT BONG FOR THE SHIT TO HIT YOUR CHEST PAUSE.
THATS ALL I CAN THINK OF FOR NOW MY NIGGA, ALL THIS SHIT I JUST PUT UP IS "MUST HAVE DO OR DIE", IF YOU MISS EVEN ONE OF THOSE THINGS THE CHAIN REACTION COULD BE FATAL AND LEAVE YOU SANS PUSSY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE (IN THAT CRIB)...IF ANY OF YALL NIGGAS SEE ANYTHING I MISSED, THERES COMMENTS RIGHT DOWN THERE v HOLLA AT THE KID!!!
