Dear mero,
My girlfriend goes to college 10 million miles away..I don't go to college..so I fuck a lot of other hoes behind her back. I met this one bitch thru a mutual friend a couple months ago..cool ass bitch..and her booty look like 2 official size NBA basketballs put together..I been pipin' on a regular basis for almost a month now..but last night I was textin her n shit..and she starts tellin me that she a freak n stuff...so I text her like "yea? What's the wildest shit u ever done" and she was like "I don't wanna tell u I don't want u to think different of me" so I told her I don't care ima nasty nigga! She text me back sayin she had a foursome once..that's not THAT bad right? Wrong..she text me again and said it was her and 3 dudes. =o.....yea nigga..if I was drinkin coffee I woulda spit that shit all over my fuckin wall..this hoes is real attached now..how the fuck am I supposed to tell this bitch I don't want anything to do with her hoe ass??
FIRST OF ALL IM DYIN AT THIS BITCH TELLIN YOU SHE HAD A "4SOME" WHEN EFFECTIVELY THE BITCH GOT TRIZZED, EARLY. IF YOU'RE A BITCH AND 3 NIGGAS SIMULSMASHED THEN YOU DIDN'T HAVE A "4SOME"...NIGGAS RAN TRIZZ ON YOU. (FOR YOU NIGGAS THAT AREN'T FROM THE BRONX TRIZZ IS TRAIN IE: GETTIN A TRAIN RAN ON YOU AND IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A TRAIN IS YOU NEED TO WATCH WARRIORS OR SUMM)
IF YOU WANNA DEAD HER, WHICH I GUESS IS UP TO YOU, BUT IS A BAD LOOK CUZ A BITCH THATS A SLUT LIKE THAT PROBABLY GOT SLUT FRIENDS AND I CAN TELL YOU FROM EXPERIENCE BEING IN A ROOM WITH 2 OR 3 SLUTS AND SOME HENNESSY AND SOME KINDA NARCOTICS IS UP THERE IN THE "WHATS POPPIN" CATEGORY. USUALLY THE NIGHT WILL END LIKE ONE OF THOSE OLD FREESTYLE SESSIONS ON HOT97 WHERE LIKE ROCAFELLA OR THE LOX WOULD GO UP THERE AND EVERYONE WOULD GET ON THE MIC AND FREESTYLE EXCEPT YOUR DICK IS THE MIC AND THESE BITCHES ARE THE LOX, YOU CAN CALL THE BITCH WITH THE WORST HEADGAME SHEEK LOUCH AND MAKE HER GO FIRST...TELL FLEX TO DROP A BOMB ON IT.
BUT YOU WANNA GET RID OF THE BITCH AND IMA GIVE YOU 5 DIFFERENT OPTIONS CUZ I KNOW NIGGAS NEED OPTIONS, THERE'S A PIZZA PLACE BY MY CRIB THAT ONLY SERVES PIZZA AND BEEF PATTIES...WHATS REALLY GOOD WITH THAT B? IMA EAT PIZZA EVERY NIGHT? WHAT IF I WANT A FUCKIN STROMBOLI OR SOME SHIT B NO HOMO? SHIT IS MADE OUTTA PIZZA INGREDIENTS YOU NIGGAS IS JUST WILD LAZY, NIGGAS NEED TO GET SOME MEXICANS ON DECK...ANYWAY LEMME PUT YOU ON.
1) YOU CAN TELL HER YOU GOT A GIRL, THIS MIGHT NOT WORK BECAUSE IF SHE'S REALLY A SLUT SHE PROLLY NOT GONNA GIVE A FUCK. UNLESS SHE'S ONE OF THOSE DELUSIONAL HOES THAT WANTS A NIGGA TO ACCEPT HER HOEOSITY AND KEEP LOVIN IT, LIKE MY SON EDDIE WINSLOW AND SUPAHEAD. IF THAT WORKS READ NO FURTHER, IF IT DON'T...
2) TELL HER YOU GOT AN STD, AGAIN THIS MIGHT NOT WORK CUZ ANY TRUE HO KNOWS THAT MOST STD'S ARE BULLSHIT AND CAN BE CURED WITH A PILL OR SOME KINDA FROZEN METAL THING THAT BURNS THEM PP WARTS OFF. YOU DEFINITELY DON'T WANNA SAY YOU GOT THE GERM CUZ SHE'LL MAKE A FACEBOOK GROUP BLOWIN YOU UP AND POST THE SHIT ON DONTDOITGIRL.COM.
3)IF THAT DON'T WORK DO SOMETHIN CRAZY LIKE SHITTIN ON YOURSELF AT THE BAR, LIKE LITERALLY SHIT IN YOUR PAMPER...OR START TALKIN TO YOURSELF, AGAIN THIS IS SOMETHING YOU MIGHT NOT WANNA DO CUZ BITCHES TALK. BUT YO, IF YOU GOT MORE OF A REPUTATION THAN SHE DOES YOU COULD JUST BE LIKE "YOU CRAZY? I WOULD NEVER SHIT ON MYDELF NIGGA! THAT BITCH JUST MAD CUZ I AIN'T WANNA FUCK HER CUZ 8 NIGGAS RAN TRIZZ ON HER IN MCDONALDS PARKIN LOTIN A JETTA"...HYPERBOLE IS NECESSARY AND YOU GOTTA MULTIPLY THE NUMBER OF NIGGAS THAT TRIZZED SO NIGGAS WONT THINK YOU'RE WILD SHERM...CUZ MOST NIGGAS WOULD BE LIKE "WHOA SHE'S THE ILL SMUT, BRING HER THROUGH!"
4)CALL UP WIFEY, TELL ER...GET EM GIRL! YOU COULD SIC YOUR GIRL ON THIS BITCH AND PRETEND LIKE SHE'S THROWIN THE CHOCKY AT YOU AND YOU MAD INNOCENT AND DISTRAUGHT. IDK HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT FAKE CRYIN BUT CALL THE BITCH UP FAKE CRYIN AND BE LIKE "BABY IM SO ANGRY!" THEN TELL HER SHORTY IS TRYING TO GET YOU TO PIPE THE CHEEKS. THEN THE SHIT IS OUTTA YOUR HANDS.
5)PUNCH THIS BITCH IN THE FACIAL, THIS IS THE "BREAK THE GLASS IN CASE OF SPRUNG BITCH EMERGENCY" MANEUVER B. IF YOU PUNCH A BITCH IN THE GRILLATIN THEN SHE PROLLY WILL NOT WANT TO FUCK WITH YOU NO MORE, JUST DON'T DO THIS IF SHE'S WHITE CUZ SHE'LL CALL PO AND HER POPS IS THE ADA AND HE'LL PROSECUTE YA JORDANS OFF. ANY OTHER SPECIES OF BITCH THEN SWING FOR THE FENCES HOMIE, IF YOU SMACK SHORTY LIPGLOSS OFF HER FACE SHE IS NOT GONNA TEXT YOU OR CALL YOU NO MORE AT LEAST UNTIL THE SWELLING GOES DOWN WHICH GIVES YOU TIME TO CHANGE YOUR NUMBER.
TRY IT B, YOU AINT EVEN GOTTA REPORT BACK CUZ I KNOW ONE OF THESE SOLUTIONS IS FINNA SOLUTE...AND YO, YOU NEED TO HIT THAT CLINIC UP IF YOU FUCKED THIS BITCH RAWDINGO. ALSO, CALL ME D'ANTONI IM GIVIN THIS BITCH A DNPB* (COACHES DECISION) CUZ THATS THE QUICK WAY TO GET THE GERMINGTON.
*DO NOT PEANUT BUTTER
